did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
