Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
