I'm really into asian looking animals
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize
