Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
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