ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
