I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
