FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
