He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
