i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
