So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
