We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
