To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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