Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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