Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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