Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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