The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
