Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
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