yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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