Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize