Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I need water and some morals
Randomize
