Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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