she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
