I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
