you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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