i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
