she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
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The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
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All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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