You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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