i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize
