apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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