now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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