ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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