Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
