Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
