He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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