I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
