so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
