So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
