I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
