did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
