can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
