only if we run a train.
done.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Randomize
