He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
