I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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