I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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