She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
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