what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
