the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
