Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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