Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize