But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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